Three Guys Walk Into a Bar

Three guys with a perfectly acceptable race-balance and blend of machismo with friendliness walk into a bar...

Three guys working hard feel a little bit thirsty...

Three guys chilling out feel like a beer...

Some negative comments about the new Heineken ad made me think about the whole genre of beer advertising, and in particular just how outdated some of the 'three men and a little lager' ads feel. Though thankfully there aren't too many of them left.

Carlsberg has kept things interesting by having a great tagline, but they recently confused the hell out of it by introducing a second tagline that doesn't seem to fit.

Strongbow's latest ads however, raise a smile but they couldn't feel more like they are trying to be identifiable if the voiceover screamed "Look hard working cockney geezer, this 'ere hard working chap is just like you, maybe you should drink Strongbow too". Were it not a pastiche idea the shot where they look over at the pub would have made me cringe.

There have been so many 'three guys in a pub' ads. Some are funny, or silly, but most just feel like the same template. The beer ads we remember now are the ones that are more expansive, those with wider ideas and themes.

Although maybe, just maybe the criticism of the over-elaborate styling and content of these new beer ads opens up an opportunity for some good ads in the old way. After all, John Webster made the 'three guys in a pub' extremely interesting back in the seventies and early eighties. If we do it though, let's at least do it well.

The Great Drinks Debate

The Kaiser is hosting the battle of the beverages; and I have chosen the mantle of Great British Ale. Now, I contemplated some snazzy diagrams or charts, but frankly the facts speak for themselves. First round we are up against lager, please vote!

Why British Ale?

1. Choice - British ale comes in hundreds of varieties. Light, mild, bitter, dark, fruity, tangy. Whatever your taste in beer there is an ale to suit you.

2. Supporting Local Businesses - British Ale is made by hundreds of small independent brewers, making new drinks every year to meet the tastes of the consumer. You can try different beers in every county in Britain. In contrast, lager is dominated by multinational conglomerates.

3. Development - British Ale constantly changes and develops, lager remains almost exactly the same as 30 years ago; yes, it still mostly tastes of cats piss. With ale you get both the heritage of the old, but development of the new.

4. Worth Fighting For - When the lager producing industries tried to use their ownership of pubs to force out real ale, they sparked a movement which became CAMRA (Campaign for Real Ale), and slowly they fought back and ensured real ale retained its place. Who would campaign to save Carling or Carlsberg?!

5. Who Drinks It - When was the last time you heard of loutish teenagers causing trouble after sinking twenty pints of Bombadier or Old Speckled Hen?

Please vote now! Thank you.

Remember, this isn't about who drinks more of what. This is about the merits of each drink, and even if it was; ale is catching up lager as people get sick of every lager tasting the same... yes, like cat's piss.

Image from my favourite Ale makers - Black Sheep Brewery

99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall

You take one down, hand it to an orchestral artist...

Brilliant brilliant stuff from VB beer in Australia:

Bottle Sounds